Pocky and Spandex
by Reina0
Summary: When Heero eats Duo's Pocky, Duo threatens to shrink his spandex shorts in the drier. Chaos ensues.


They Are, After All, 15

(Disclaimer: the usual. Warnings: the G-boys are probably slightly out of character for most of these fics.)

_1) On Pocky and Spandex_

"Hey, Heero, where's my Pocky?" Duo sauntered into Heero's room with a confused expression on his face.

---tense silence---

"OK, that's it; your spandex is going in the drier!" Duo yanked open Heero's drawer and snatched up all six of the neatly folded navy shorts. He darted out of the room as Heero jumped up from his laptop.

"DUOOOO!!"

The Perfect Soldier chased the God of Death across the safehouse and cornered him next to the washing machine and drier. Moving swiftly, Duo yanked open the drier door and held the shorts just inside. "Go buy me more Pocky right now or I'll---" Duo let one pair of shorts drop into the machine.

Heero made a desperate lunge for his spandex garments, but Duo reached for the 'start' button threateningly. The Japanese boy stopped short, glaring at the American.

Wufei, curious to know why Duo was holding Heero's clothing hostage, came up behind them. "What's the matter this time?"

"He ate my Pocky---again!" Duo snarled.

"He's going to shrink my spandex!" Heero snapped at the same time.

Wufei tapped a foot against the floor. "Yuy, while you purchase more Pocky for Maxwell, I'll make sure he doesn't put your things in the drier."

"Get chocolate and strawberry---those are my favorite flavors!!" Duo yelled as Heero stomped away.

"And coconut!" Quatre called out from the kitchen. Trowa looked up from reading the newspaper and glanced at Quatre. "Oh, and Trowa 'says' he wants the vanilla kind," the blond pilot added. Trowa nodded once, satisfied.

Heero paused in front of the door to turn and level a glare at everyone.

Wufei held up a hand. "While you're at it---" he began tentatively.

"What?" Heero growled.

"Caramel."

Heero turned on his heel and slammed the door. A few moments later, they heard Trowa's motorcycle roar to life.

_I could have sworn I hid the keys from him in a foolproof location this time,_ Trowa 'said' (by shaking his head a little and turning back to the news).

"Hey, Wufei," Duo said brightly, secure in the knowledge that many boxes of Pocky were on the way to his stomach.

The Chinese boy recognized the look on his face before Duo could get another word out. "No, Maxwell. You may _not_ shrink any of Yuy's apparel."

"Just one?" Duo whined. "I always wanted to see what shrunken spandex looks like."

"It looks exactly the same," Wufei said sternly, "only smaller."

"Well, _duh_," Trowa grumbled. No one heard him.

Quatre started to make a salad, remarking thoughtfully, "Doesn't the spandex have to be wet to shrink, though? I'm not certain, but I don't think that it would make any difference if Duo put Heero's spandex in the drier as is."

Duo pulled the spandex from the drier and opened the washing machine. Wufei slammed the lid shut abruptly. "NO."

"But it'd be really funny_._"

"I said NO!"

"It's only funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's hilarious," Trowa said randomly. "I saw that on a t-shirt once."

The other three pilots stared at him for long minutes. He stared right back. Then Quatre shook his head vigorously, saying, "Sorry---I could have sworn I actually heard Trowa. . . _talking_."

"Me, too," Duo said vaguely. Wufei just stood there and blinked.

Duo promptly took advantage of the situation. Shunting Wufei to the side, he tossed the spandex into the washing machine and fiddled with the knobs. By the time Wufei had regained control of the machine, the spandex was thoroughly soaked.

"Brilliant, Maxwell," Wufei seethed. "Now these have to air-dry! It'll take at least a day and a half!"

"Or we could put them in the drier," Duo said nonchalantly.

Wufei gave him a close, searching look. Finally, though, he shrugged. "Yuy will murder us. . . but whatever."

"Alright, Wu! You rock!" Duo fished the sopping spandex from the washer and dumped them in the drier. "Which setting is fastest? They need to be done before Heero gets back."

Quatre came to join them. "We should probably set it on 'more dry' so that they shrink as tiny as possible."

Trowa made a tiny coughing noise which probably meant, _Oh man, Heero's gonna kill us, but it's totally worth it!_

The drier started up with a loud rumbling noise. Duo sat down in front of it to watch the spandex through the cloudy plastic door. "Who's gonna keep a lookout for Heero?"

"I can distract him in the kitchen," Quatre volunteered, "if he comes back too soon."

And indeed Heero did return too soon---Quatre hadn't even reached his half finished salad before Heero clomped back inside.

"Oh---ah---hi, Heero!" Quatre chirped, glancing at the others nervously.

Heero dumped a large grocery bag on the table. It was packed with enough Pocky to last Trowa, Quatre, and Wufei until the end of the war, and Duo until the end of the week. Maybe. "Pocky," he said in perfect Japanese monotone.

"Wow, Yuy," Wufei said gruffly, coughing a little. "That's, um, great. Uh---" He looked guiltily at the washing machine.

Heero shrugged. "Hn. I expected as much." They noticed he was carrying another bag, a little smaller. "More shorts," he explained curtly. With that, he entered his room and shut the door with an indifferent click. Understandably, his four fellow pilots were a little annoyed.

The drier buzzed and Duo picked up a tiny pair of spandex shorts. "Perfect Soldier thinks he's won this round," he muttered. "But wait 'till he sees that I dyed his spare tanktops pink."

"Nothing wrong with pink," Quatre muttered defensively.

A few minutes of silence. Then:

"DUUUUUUOOOOOO!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY TANKS?!!"

"I should think _that_ would be easy enough to figure out," Duo said irately, before he began running.

Notes

This is a fanfiction arc by your truly, so look for updates!! They will all be posted separately, since I haven't got the hang of this chapter-adding thing. ;) Tsukiyo


End file.
